Giving Gifts, My birthday was just a few weeks ago. I turned 43. 43 does not denote the start of a new decade. It’s not one of those birthdays that people normally celebrate in a big fashion, and mine was no exception. 안전한 카지노사이트
Nobody threw me a spectacular surprise party. I had a few modest dinners with close friends and relatives. I unwrapped two presents.
Nonetheless, as I celebrate my birthday, I can’t fathom feeling more appreciated, respected, and loved.
Because, on this not-so-significant birthday, in addition to those two gifts
I received some additional gifts – gifts that cost nothing and that I have come to know are, in fact, rather significant.
As we approach the holiday season, it’s a good idea to take a moment to consider gifts. What are they for?
On a basic level, we offer gifts because we are expected to. It’s typical on special occasions like birthdays, anniversaries, dinner parties, and the end of the year.
Underlying that custom is a vital goal: appreciation.
We give gifts to show individuals that we appreciate them and cherish the role they play in our lives.
However, there is a frequent misconception: the larger and more precious the gift
The more it conveys our gratitude. I know people who have received large stock grants and feel grossly undervalued.
Because presents do not communicate gratitude, people do. When people do not express themselves, neither do their gifts.
What were the gifts that meant so much to me on my forty-third birthday?
My wife Eleanor invited a small group of my friends to write me a note of appreciation, “a idea or goal or poem that encourages him to accept himself just as he is,” she wrote to each friend.
He is just how he is. There is no more powerful method to recognize others than to express gratitude for them just as they are.
Despite this, we nearly never do it. Especially in a business environment where we frequently push people to change and value them for what they can achieve for us and the organization.
Consider our annual business rituals: performance reviews, holiday parties, and, if we’re lucky, bonuses.
Performance appraisals are designed to identify our strengths, and the greatest evaluators spend the majority of their time focusing on them.
However, it is not a review until we look at our weaknesses, areas “to develop,” and areas where we fall short.
In other words, we tell them they aren’t good enough right after we tell them how terrific they are.
Holiday parties typically include a speech from the CEO or another leader congratulating staff for their hard work during the year and motivating them to work even harder in the coming year.
It’s an essential ritual, but it’s impersonal because it’s administered to the entire company or department at once.
And it’s usually about what we’ve accomplished rather than who we are. People do not have feelings.
Bonuses are a business transaction, based not on appreciating us for who we are 카지노사이트
But on rewarding us for what we have accomplished, and are frequently provided without ceremony or clearly stated appreciation.
Massive stock grants that undervalued people? Overnight, they were literally placed on people’s empty chairs.
There is no note. There was no conversation. It’s just a scrap of paper on a chair.
I’m not saying these traditions aren’t significant. People work together in companies to accomplish things
Therefore it stands to reason that our organizational rituals reward people for completing tasks and boosting their ability to complete additional tasks in the future.
But I’d like to recommend another approach to appreciate those around us.
Tell them why you appreciate them in a handwritten note. It costs nothing and feels amazing for everyone involved.
Not because of what they do for you. Not for what they help you achieve. Not even for what they achieve on their own. Simply for being themselves.
If you’re hesitant — perhaps you think it’s too sentimental, too mushy — consider what it would be like to get that type of note from the people around you.
The difficult part is not to be stingy.
You should do this even for folks who cause you conflict. Perhaps you don’t agree with all they say.
Perhaps you don’t always appreciate them for who they are.
That’s fine; this isn’t a performance evaluation. You are not required to address every aspect of each individual.
This is a present. There’s no reason to hoard your gratitude; it’s limitless.
Simply consider what you like about people and express that aspect.
Tell them what makes you happy about them. What you find admirable. What makes them unique to you.
Then hand them your cards and individually thank them for working with you.
If you’re feeling shy, simply leave the notes on their seats overnight; there’s no risk of them opening them and feeling unappreciated.
I know it made my otherwise unimportant mid-decade birthday the most memorable one yet. 카지노 블로그